_my love for you;

Meeting someone dying

Monday, November 24, 2008

The weekend was a painful one for me. On Saturday, i was just telling my mother that a friend's grandma had cancer but she is coping well with it. Then later in the day, my mother received a call from a long time friend. It turned out that her daughter was holding on to her phone. That friend has just been admitted into the hospice the day before. I couldn't believe it because a couple of months back she had an op and she seems okie when we visited her. Also later we went to her house and she was her usual self.

We rushed home to settle some stuffs before going out to the hospice. We rushed there knowing that she didn't had long to live. I couldn't imagine how bad it could be until we went in and i saw her lying there. The frail lady lying on the bed couldn't be her. I just couldn't believe it. I had to hold in my tears. I supressed the urge to rush out of the room and cry for fear of hurting her.

The aunty being said has cancer and it's the last stage of it. The horrible disease that has reduced her to that stage. She used to be plump and happy. But now she is no different to those who had starved during war time. She couldn't even speak and the way she looked and held my mother's hand was so painful. It was as though she wished to see my mother more before she leaves us. Her hand and feet were so cold i feared that this was the last time i will see her. She dotes on me a lot and it just hurts bad.

I used to only feel the terror of this disease but never had i imagined the effect it can have on a normal person. And when i saw that the aunty's used to be long hair is now just a bad crop and it's with white hair. You couldn't imagine the sadnss i felt in me. She used to have such long beautiful hair and coloured that i secretly long for. But now...everything has changed. It's foreign to me be seeing a dying person. I just wish that things can be different.

-Sign Off @ 8:01 AM :)